bittersweet.
i have the most mixed feelings about moving back to LA. i’m starting to confuse myself.

i am excited to have my own place, but at the same time, i don’t want to leave home.

i caught myself calling USC “home” last year. it was the weirdest thing. i hope that i’ll find my apartment feeling like home soon enough too.

i talked to kristen on the phone yesterday while she was at the new apartment, and i suddenly got really excited about the new room and place. i love the freedom. i love the independence.

but there’s this feeling at home that i get that i love so much that makes me never want to leave. it’s this comfort that i haven’t felt anywhere else. sometimes at usc, i’d start to feel overwhelmed with stress or drama and going home was always a nice escape.

i like the distance usc is from home. it’s almost perfect. far enough away, yet close enough to come home.

i am excited to decorate the new apartment, but i don’t want to pack.

i remember how late i started packing for the dorms last summer. or even to leave the dorms last spring. i think that it’s just how i am.

i find packing emotionally exhausting. what to take, what to leave. what to get rid of.

having more space will be nice. i still can’t believe how much stuff i managed to fit into my side of the dorm last year.

i am excited to end summer school, but i don’t want to leave work yet.

too bad it works backwards. i end my internship on friday and summer school the following wednesday.

work wasn’t so bad without summer school. going to meetings, dressing up, meeting new people. i’d say my first job wasn’t a bad experience. plus, getting paid isn’t so bad either..

summer school is so time consuming. each c++ project gets longer and longer. i don’t hate it, but i wish i had had more free time this summer.

i am excited to see my sc friends again, but i am going to miss everyone from back home.

talking and hanging out with usc friends makes me excited to go back to sc. i feel like i’m leaving so early. well, i suppose i am.

it’s hard to find that balance between school, friends, and everything else. especially with the addition of friends from home and friends from school. i’ve gotten a lot better at keeping in touch though, i hope. i promise i’ll try.

cute song on repeat.
Oh you’re everything I’m wanting
Come to think of it, I’m aching
On account of my transgression..
Will you welcome this confession?

Could this be out of line?
To say you’re the only one breaking me down like this
You’re the only one I would take a shot on
Keep me hanging on so contagiously
– “so contagiously” by acceptance

RAVE// cool summer days in socal.
RANT// people who don’t respond to e-mails or any other form of communication at work.